I just need to share this very specific dream I had about you last night. Sigh. I have no idea where it fits into my framework, but perhaps it you may shed some light. We were invited to view your new home that you had built – it turned out to be a big cottage in the garden of your parent’s home. There was already an established garden with strange things like a large bread bush (made from white bread, that you could smell and taste). The kitchen was big! With a table in it, we sat down to a meal (unsure what that was) and your father had joined us. His face was clear in the dream – but I only know he was your father because you said so, not because I would recognize him if I were to find him in my soup. We were chatting. You were frustrated that your dad kept hanging around. Eventually you announced your wedding (or I asked and you confirmed) and your dad threw a fit. He made it clear that he did not mind you living on the property but not to go around telling people you were to marry. And he stormed off in a huff. We followed to the main house at a distance and encountered your mother. Her face was not clear at all. But she was loving and motherly and a large soft woman. She engulfed us in calmness and warmth, and reassured us that all was fine. She had no problems with what you were doing, that she and your dad really loved you regardless. And that she just copes with your dads outbursts about it by carrying on regardless. She knows he will never stop supporting you or her. Then my mother arrived to meet yours…. And I woke up.
Flashback Friday, a column on feminist notions ... To be fair - it's difficult to think of a non-self-defining feminist woman as anything but a tool of the patriarchy. I have to concentrate on the fact that even though a woman would not call herself a feminist, she would never endorse footbinding (to name a radical example) and it doesn't necessarily mean she is a doormat either. In fact, some of my favorite women scorn my feminism and hate it when they are judged solely on their marital status or gender. Ironically if you look at films made during the so-called liberal 60s and 70s you will see that movies align the woman's role less to what is happening politically in the big wide world and more to what is happening in pornography. The rise of the snuff movie mirrored the rise of violence towards women in the movies, serial killer paradise. Pornography always centers on the woman - probably in an attempt to hide the size of the penis. From my perspective, I am less un...
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