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Showing posts from 2009

Gay people forcing their morality on defenceless heterosexuals

It is about forcing or imposing the gay/lesbian community's will and morality on people who believe it contradicts their morality. And once it has the power of law behind it, it will eventually foster things like forcing ministers, priests, rabbis, etc., to officiate at these "weddings," or their churches/synagogues lose their tax status and worse. Sort of like Catholic medical schools that, for a period of time not that long ago, were mandated to teach abortion or lose their accreditation, forcing medical students of conscience who wanted to have an accredited degree to be seriously affected. It's about the terminology that this powerful lobbying force thinks it needs, which is chillingly similar to the sanitizing language change imposed on us by the abortion lobby in 1973; e.g., "fetus" for unborn baby, "eliminate tissue" vs. kill a child, etc. Source: Seacoastonline.com

History of Facebook, and privacy implications

This has to be urban legend, because if this story is true, it's no wonder Facebook cares very little for our privacy and has coercive policies that benefit third-party application owners over users. The coercive element is the element where in order for me to maintain my privacy, I would have to have a Facebook profile that no one could see. That defeats the purpose. So when I make a friend, I accept their ignorance about the risk that they have exposed me to through the applications they have on their profile. I have none, but their applications have access to all the information they have access to. So if my friend can see that I am married, so can all the applications they have. So in order for me to participate, I HAVE TO ACQUIESCE to the privacy abuse. And yes, it is my choice. Thanks. :{ HISTORY OF FACEBOOK Facemash Mark Zuckerberg created Facebook in his Harvard dorm room. Mark Zuckerberg invented Facemash on October 28, 2003 while attending Harvard as a sop

Charles Leadbeater on innovation

“So the more radical the innovation, the more the uncertainty; the more you need innovation in use to work out what a technology is for. Our entire approach to patents and invention is based on the idea that the inventor knows what the invention is for; we can say what it’s for. It will be worked out in use , in collaboration with users . So, you’re in a big corporation; you’re obviously keen to go up the corporate ladder. Do you go into your board and say, look, I’ve got a fantastic idea for an embryonic product in a marginal market, with consumers we’ve never dealt with before, and I’m not sure it’s going to have a big payoff, but it could be really, really big in the future? No, what you do, is you go in and you say, I’ve got a fantastic idea for an incremental innovation to an existing product we sell through existing channels to existing users, and I can guarantee you get this much return out of it over the next three years. Big corporations have an in-built tendency to reinf

Selling sex, outrage over temporary decriminalisation of prostitution

sex work is openly selling sex for money advertising industry sells sex for money, how come sex work is criminalised we all sell sex, we spend money on vaginal rejuvenation, breast reconstruction, buying boots, we are buying to lure sex, giving out money to get sex decriminalize just during the 2010 World Cup, says Jackie Selebe. Dr Eve says this is outrageous, sexist, usury, insulting (I do too) consenting adults caller blames family breakups on sex workers... (not on the men who go to sex workers), the man chooses to go to a sex worker, he chooses to betray his wife sex workers are doing an honest day's work, why focus on them

Women are from Venus, Men are from Mars - an interview with John Gray

when women are silent, it's the silent treatment; when men are silent; they are thinking men have to be coddled - women must say please hold my hand, please take me out, please hold me don't leave (erhhh.... I know he is saying understand each other and change your behaviors for each other, but really! On the other hand, thanks to Dan, I always say - communicated!) stress hormones make men sleep, don't make women sleep stressors have to be 8 times more serious for men to react to a thing as a 'problem' - men look at them as if they are mad when they get stressed out over small things menopause is much more difficult nowadays because of all the stress, take oxytocin getting men to listen - 'Honey, just talk to me for five minutes.' If you put a end time on it, they are more likely to be engaged while doing it.

Solutions to in-law battles

don't confront the in-law directly, have to do it through the spouse respect does not mean submission, you can be assertive without being confrontational have boundaries from the beginning in-laws should not expect to be supported by the family consider that the couple's decisions are their own and should be respected both sides should consider what their expectations are, and delete them

Movie: Last chance Harvey

Strangely, this movie was about Harvey. I guess there are rarely films of gravity and wit about men's lives, but you know I was there for the Emma Thompson's character's backstory. That would have been far more interesting to me. You know I love Emma, she can do anything! And frequently does. I love her expanding middle and I love her crows feet. Perfect realness. Real perfection. And this is not vitriol, just admiration. The film is 'nice', I don't always want to see issuemovies. And yet there were issues, just well disguised. Tangible. Not too funny, not too sad, not too surprising. Britishly well-restrained.

Grahamstown - Africa Trek, a video, lecture and Q&A by Alexandre & Sonia Poussin

French people who walked from CT. Alex cycled around the world. Became a travel writer because of their adventure.  They did it slowly, didn’t know where they would sleep. Wanted to not rush through. 1002 days of walking. In SA they were passed from person to person like a rugby ball. Tribute lecture for the people here who helped them. Video of Wynne Green singing. Domestic playing with on the drum. Emotional sharing. Wynne died of cancer after they left him. 14000 km. CT to Sea of Galilee. Along Great Rift Valley, like the original people. No sponsorship. Alex was an adventurer. Had walked in the Himalayas. He was experienced at asking for hospitality. Sonia was embarrassed to ask. So Sonia left Alex to ask and he just pressed the intercom and asked. White guy. Gold chains. Wife and braai by the pool. Millionaires of Africa are all in the Cape. Tried to learn the language of every country. Went with a handheld video camera with a reversible screen so people could see themse

Tweeting on Twitter, Just Do It

I know... from now on when people say give it a bash, and I give it a bash and I can't figure out why, then I have to work on it again and again until I figure it out. This is my lesson to learn. You MUST read this Time article by Steven Johnson - How Twitter will change the way we live . Now don't be lazy. Focus on what he says about that conference, and pretend that we, you me and our groepie are a conference, let's call our conference 'Facebook', or 'South Africa', or other things we have in common. Why do you read my status updates? Same reason you should read my tweets. In fact, Facebook and Twitter and Google have all got their eye on the statuses. You can be patient and wait, they will probably become one. But Twitter is for those statuses that want to stream out into the world, that don't want to be confined. That want to be Clouded, Tagged and Aggregated. So that people can see patterns in what we are talking about.   Come play. It's n

Public speaking tips

Prepare . I don’t write out a talk word-for-word, but I use a lot of notes, and I practice it word for word, many times. That works for me. Some people do better with a more ad-lib approach. But either way, the more prepared you feel, the more relaxed you’ll feel.  Mental practice . It sounds odd, but mentally rehearsing and imagining yourelf giving a relaxed, accomplished performance really does help prepare you. In order to make that mental rehearsal as close to the real situation as possible… rehearse - avoid memorising your presentation. Never learn by rote rather visualise pictures that represent various items in your content, and then create a memory stack. Try to visit the scene . Checking out the room where you’ll be presenting will make you feel far more comfortable. Pay special attention to amplification devices: will you be wired up? use a stationary mike attached to a podium? Hold a wireless mike? Earlier that day: Don’t do anything unusual . Don’t take a nap if you don

Girls expelled from school for getting pregnant

Notice the passive voice of that sentence. I didn't know that girls could get pregnant by themselves! Redi Direko put it beautifully. "How can you expel the girls, treat girls like criminals and the guys get away with it and are sluts too." Direko was expressing her disgust that people were sending SMSes and emails to her show saying that pregnant girls are sluts and they don't want sluts around their children. Source: 702

8 rules for writing short stories

Use the time of a total stranger in such a way that he or she will not feel the time was wasted. Give the reader at least one character he or she can root for. Every character should want something, even if it is only a glass of water. Every sentence must do one of two things--reveal character or advance the action. Start as close to the end as possible. Be a Sadist. No matter how sweet and innocent your leading characters, make awful things happen to them--in order that the reader may see what they are made of. Write to please just one person. If you open a window and make love to the world, so to speak, your story will get pneumonia. Give your readers as much information as possible as soon as possible. To hell with suspense. Readers should have such complete understanding of what is going on, where and why, that they could finish the story themselves, should cockroaches eat the last few pages. Source: Bagombo Snuff Box: Uncollected Short Fiction , by Kurt Vonnegut

(Facebook) status anxiety

Someone (if you want to be credited, let me know) on Facebook recommended the book Status Anxiety by Alain de Botton to me on my profile, saying, "It is the perfect book for the recession. It deals with our secret (and shameful) yearning to be loved by the world and our anxiety about what others think of us, irrespective if we choose to be capitalist pigs or bohemians writing poetry in ivory towers. Do read!" I responded, "I avoid reading as best I can. But de Bottom is not de Only position to take. One could say that it's not Status Anxiety but Angling, Beckoning, Bruising, Bouncing, Coasting, Ducking, Enthusing, Entertaining, Flirting, Flouting, Fingering, Grinding, Hinting, Hounding, Howling, Insulting, Journeying, Luring, Musing, Nixing, Ousting, Posing, Quoting... Read More, Reminding, Sounding, Sharing, Tousling, Using, Vaunting, Whetting, (eek give me one), Zapping. I have put on my rose colored glasses and had another look at that glass with the water in it

Fielding criticism

don't use You statements, use I statements - "You never kiss me!"; "I like it when you kiss me." apply tolerance before you speak, remember things are not right or wrong accept differences, even if they are fundamental be specific about what is a End Type Issue, with yourself use the word feedback (bletch! I can translate people!) don't attack during times of stress, wait for the right moment if someone criticizes you, say "Let me think about that, I will come back to you about that." oversensitive people may be hiding from their weaknesses, confident people are more likely to take criticism in their stride treat criticism like an opportunity the criticiser has to put effort into How they criticize engage the help of the criticizer Source: 702

Bill Maher interviews Richard Dawkins

The God Delusion tired of people forcing their imaginary friends down your throat (Bill Maher phrase) scale of 1 to 7 of atheism Dawkins says he is a 6 - definitely is a very tall statement to make, unscientific, how can they KNOW there is a god Maher: religion's stories are rediculous, the talking snake religious scientists have some ideas about religion but don't believe in all the details Dawkins says readers will be atheists when they put it down Source: Dawkins Foundation

Susan Blackmore on memes and "temes"

Susan Blackmore studies memes: ideas that replicate themselves from brain to brain like a virus. She makes a bold new argument: Humanity has spawned a new kind of meme, the teme, which spreads itself via technology -- and invents ways to keep itself alive Darwin's ideas explain all design, not just biological if, if, if, then - the evolutionary algorithm design must happen if there are algorithms, you don't need an original creator Darwin didn't know about genes Dawkins' the selfish gene gets copied and doesn't care about the consequences language is another replicator - another example - it has no conscious design, it just wanders meme - that which is copied from person to person the reason why they are copied is irrelevant, good, bad, intriguing, fun the pointy fold on a looroll memes use us as mememachines, copying machines genes are a kind of meme copy the useful things and the not-useful  mimetic drive - making a bigger brain that can copy more mem

Brain searches for structure in absurdities

New research suggest that exposure to bizarre, surreal storylines such as Kafka's "The Country Doctor" can improve learning. Apparently, when your brain is presented with total absurdity or nonsense, it will work extra hard to find structure elsewhere. "People feel uncomfortable when their expected associations are violated, and that creates an unconscious desire to make sense of their surroundings. That feeling of discomfort may come from a surreal story, or from contemplating their own contradictory behaviors, but either way, people want to get rid of it. So they're motivated to learn new patterns," said Travis Proulx in the September issue of the journal Psychological Science. Source: Science Daily

Dan Dennett's response to Rick Warren

RICK WARREN the purpose-driven life (book) there's existing and living the stewardship of affluence - leadership is stewardship TED - ideas worth spreading DAN DENNET suggests that religions of the world should be taught like any other subject prohibitions, requirements, symbolism, texts, known leaders has been called totalitarian despite seeming libertarian flavor of his ideas TED - ideas worth spreading

Richard Dawkins on science is queerer than we can suppose

Biologist Richard Dawkins makes a case for "thinking the improbable" by looking at how the human frame of reference limits our understanding of the universe. if you think you understand quantum theory you don't understand quantum theory it is likely that we ingest molecules of pee, unchanged are there things ungraspable we have given preference to things that TED - ideas worth spreading

Julia Sweeney on letting go of God

Julia was asked by young missionaries, "Do you believe that God loves you.?" Who then went on to explain their religion which sounded very strange. She realises that if she were hearing the story of Jesus and the virgin birth it would sound just as strange as what they were telling her about their faith. She realises that she feels God's love in dawn, in helpfulness, in love. "I feel God's love often, but I wasn't so sure I believed what I so clearly felt." TED - ideas worth spreading

Richard Dawkins on militant atheism

Dawkins has become outspoken in his atheism , coining the word "bright" (as an alternate to atheist), and encouraging fellow non-believers to stand up and be identified. intelligent design is creationism redressed creationists are right that evolution is hostile to evolution statistical improbability of the complexity of design - intelligent design but the intelligent designer wouldn't have made such a hash - why would the designer be bothered with disapproving of our sex lives, favor our side in the war Dawkins suggest rocking the boat - attack religion as a whole taboo of speaking ill about religion - Douglas Adams said, sacred ideas at the heart of religion, holy cows, you can support any operating system you want, but the challenge of religious ideas is off limits science and religion are corrosive to each other - religious explanations are trivial and improbably, teaches people to accept authoritarianism takes the example of famous scientists and imagines

Transgender, some comments

Anonymous: I read an amazing article a week or so ago, about why civilized humans resist that which is the other eg animals, gay people, people of different faiths, disabled people and how this is completely contrary to evolutionary principles, because diversity actually benefits evolutionary progress. Anonymous: everyone is full of shit. Some more than others it's such a complex thing; sex is part of that very deep core of the brain; it does not exist in the cortex with logical thinking; just as people dont have control over; what they find sexy, neither do they; have control over the emotions they; feel over differences. maybe a bit like religion; maybe people's sexuality is so closely linked to their identity and self worth that when they see someone doing something that they cannot identify they feel as though their own sexuality is being violated? BUT sexuality, altough important, is only one facet of our existence. I dont know why people make such a big deal of it. Atta

Condom machines in the bathroom

sex ed to start from age 5 - not to say show them a porn movie, but start introducing notions doesn't make kids have more sex makes them more likely to use condoms when they do by taking opportunities to address sexuality out of the public sphere it puts the onus on parents to guide their children's sex decision making often children aren't even thinking sex when we think they are thinking sex - Sexpo billboard - often our reactions put things in their minds SOLUTION FROM LISTENER: teach kids how to be parents before you teach them about sex the consequences of sex is not pregnancy it is pleasure, fear tactics don't work don't just talk to children about sex, talk about relationships, love, age-appropriate sex (underage sex could land you in jail), guidance about how loving should happen, HIV education no guilt tripping, no coercion if they do something 'wrong' sexually, work through it with them so that they know how to do it better, no punishmen

Disobedience notes

co-opt others to throw out the old ways the necessary radicalness of disobedience in communication responsibility to be visibly disobedient to draw others to our rooms (concept they used to focus where disobedience can take place - labeled pages as Bed-Room and other symbolic keywords of disobedience options we put our names down on the page and met in the symbolic space to throw ideas around the space names were familiar - nursery - but there we found seeds of changes, trees of stability these were foci of things you might want to change do the things that children do to enter into the state of mind of a child single words are evocative - thanks meet the dragon and absorb the hero

How to speak in public

start with a bang pose a bullet list of the topics you will cover that expose the overview of your argument don't pose alternatives - present them as possibilities repeat the conclusion at the beginning of every section of your talk, explain your bullet points establish the relevance, what is the audience thinking about the topic - faith, reason, problem, solution multimedia - draw examples from movies, tv, newspapers, books define important terms what are the broad streams of thought about the topic strangers are in two separate worlds - how, why, mechanism, meaning, science Powerpoint slides - don't read of the slides, but if you are going to read quotes have them on the side; have phrases from your point on the side of the slide concerning the point; names of people you are quoting write in full on screen. real world examples of your hypothesis, your point, your exposition be within your allotted time invite questions and then try to draw their points inclusivel

Documentary: Wordplay

Wordplay is a fantastic documentary on crossword puzzles called Wordplay. Fantabulous! Extraordinary! Stunning! Beautifully done. Interviews all sorts of people - celebrities, puzzle makers, New York Times public editors, a guy who decided to make an annual event for the people holed up in their rooms to get out and meet like-minded puzzlers. The competitiveness! Worth keeping. The Indigo girls - and a brief shot of a concert - a sea of dykes. Heaven.

Movie: Coco Chanel

Coco Chanel was kinda nice, great cinematography - or shall I say, it wasn't linear but it was a bit been there done that. Her long-time lover was badly cast. But I loved the woman who played her, and there were great notions. Coco was wonderful.

Movie: District 9

I love scifi, and I live in South Africa, 50 kms from where they made the movie. Our local film industry is very sad, but District 9 was great! Very very very very violent, very very very pointed about apartheid. Some hard bits to see, which made it great! But I could never see it again. Way too hectic. We South Africans are very gritty. I was just saying to one of my international pals on Facebook that we don't use the word nice here in South Africa - it would be too anomalous, too weird, too freaky, to unfitting. There are no nice situations here. It's hectic! No one is emigrating to South Africa.... unless they are transferred or living in a place where their limbs are getting hacked off because they don't fit in their social groups!

Why did feminim become a movement?

I was reading a manist's blog (Pelle Billing) and responses to his suggestion that there should be a masculist movement was met by comments that that would just be repeating the mistakes of feminism - that equality should be part of the liberal agenda and not start pitting factions against each other. I was thinking that the desire for a masculist movement is reactionary. To his credit Billing took the criticism and agreed with the point. He is prolific, try this Google search . Here is Pelle Billing's blog . Here is Pelle Billing's website . Would feminism ever have become a movement had there not been opposition to it? Women had to find a name for the thing they were standing up to support. And men had to find a name for the thing they wanted to rail against. At the time when feminism started did it have a name? A movement with no name. All movements start nameless. The early feminists were women who knew they were being coerced and raped and were no more than

Coryisms (from Cory Doctorow)

Cory Doctorow (craphound.com) is a science fiction author, activist, journalist and blogger -- the co-editor of Boing Boing (boingboing.net) and the author of the bestselling Tor Teens/HarperCollins UK novel Little Brother . He is the former European director of the Electronic Frontier Foundation and co-founded the UK Open Rights Group. Born in Toronto, Canada, he now lives in London. Artists' problem is not poverty, but obscurity. His books are free, but they are digital - digital happens on a device on which sustained attention is difficult, so you would buy the book - you pay close attention to a book. Nerdvana  Scifi shows the anxieties we have about the technologies around us today. Technological Stalinism When you solve a problem you become a problem because you are invested in hanging around to keep solving the problem. Commercial and non-commercial rights can apply to the same work - the guy who make Transformers owns one of Doctorow's books for commercial activ

Stupid to ban Facebooking in the military

It's problematic to ban social networking on "official" machines, which only pushes personnel to use these things on "unofficial" machines with "unofficial" ISPs, where you're less likely to detect attacks and it's harder to respond to them. Bring them in-house, in a controlled way, where you can better manage security issues and have happier personnel ( emphasis added , fetsi). Source: Dan Wallach, Freedom to Tinker

Gender(and sexuality)-based violence

Why do They feel justified to be violent when confronted with gender and sexuality-based Otherness? It could be that people are very aware of insecurity that lies behind violence. The insecurity would only be one of the causes of violence... one of the others might be (I know I am going to get stoned for this) that They perceive an arrogance on the part of Us - how dare we flaunt (Otherness), not hide (Otherness) like 'respectable people'. Eek.

The fetsiboomsticks take on the future of the internet

CMS I don't know what the answer is for artists who want to play on the web. It's all about learning applications... Facebook's structure was made with CMS. But then you become a developer and not an artist. MMORPG You get these things called Multiplayer role playing games MMORPG that often are just text based... it reaches a huge audience. Movie theatres have started investigating how to get these people to come play at the movie theaters... to harvest their money. I have been finding with the kids I am teaching that 25 year olds are talking to me about the role of video games in their marriages...! FUTURE OF THE WEB AND MEDIA - IPHONE The future of the computer is that it will be gone... onto an iPhone kind of a thing... like a playstation 3 but it won't be a separate unit, it will be merged into the iphone which has already merged with the ipod - and has fantabulous application books... Anni... you have to have one! I have downloaded an ebook onto m

On my mind: Change resisters

People don't take things on board easily, and toy with them, see what they can get out of them and spit out the things that they don't like. They resist input, resist change. I am so not like that, that when I turn from version 3 of an application to version 4, that I embrace the newness and if, ten minutes later I turn back to 3, I have to think about the old harder. I don't mind turning back, you understand, just my mind naturally goes to 'progression', to see what the new and improved version is. I desire it, I lust it, and I investigate it in seconds and can objectively evaluate if there is an improvement, but I don't resist a backwards step. A backwards step is also a forward step because it makes you aware of stepping back. All very abstract I know.... But there is a notion lurking around in feminist circles, which I naturally have toyed with, that men are necrophiliacs, that they don't want a live, warm, thinking, disagreeing, smelling, desiring, lust

Give yourself a job (interview Ian Clark)

Start slowly - e.g. start with a bucket and a sponge and grow into a multi-person, uniformed, formally asked for at garages, team of carwashers Opportunity coaches - a team of people who share a context and help you recognise and start a business, mentors, advisors who each have their own field of expertise Common mistakes - research first, then market research the people you are getting, open a business account, do the things you are good at and subcontract to experts (especially accountants), save and put money back into your business, network with other businesses like yours and build overflow relationships with them (then if you need something you can ask them) Money - avoid lending from banks, make partnerships (cover all details, with contract), when will you pay out the profits, what percentages, get financial advice to govern the partnership relationship Second job - keep your day job, get someone to help you with your second job and build slowly Someone may steal my idea - don

Bookbit: The Ritz Carlton, Bangkok

Isn't it amazing that we all have a 9/11 memory. Yes Collosusness scares us - fear of so many eggs being in one basket. We want to find a rock to hide under because of our fear of what would happen if we were living at the top of the mountain with the most beautiful view, viscerally engaged with babeling. Another bookbit lurks here. Source: Office for Metropolitan Architecture

Bookbit: Suicide because Facebook has destroyed communication skills

One of my big issues, bugbears, points of coherence is that the communication skills of [teenagers] must be improved. I think much of the work-world disaster happening in this country can be improved by improving communication skills. (How's that for oversimplification?) And I believe that Facebook can enhance communication and should be a REQUIREMENT for everyone - an allotment of half an hour compulsory Facebook time per day - is where I stand. And libraries and internet cafés should be given incentive tax cuts to issue time cards where people can get free internet access for that half hour.... oooh I see a booky element here (thanks Cory)... the logistical issues can be solved, whatever. [snaps fingers]. Sorted. I would think, therefore, that there would be less suicide because people would be better able to measure their connection with the world; have provided themselves lots of opportunities to connect; have better work environments because of improved communication; have bet

Bookbit: The gods must be crazy

The movie, about the coke bottle that causes trouble in a culture that has no ready-made use for the coke bottle. They use their imagination, use it for all sorts of things, and it causes trouble because it is a scarce resource. To Caroline on Facebook. We hardly ever get this kind of cultural commonality anymore, hey... The Gods must be Crazy had a profound (yes, I used the word profound about this film) effect on my attitudes about cultural diversity. Thanks for giving me back this memory-feeling-thing. Great moment. Only we can get that feeling in the same way, don't you think. The now-generation won't get it the way we did. Or did you, now-generation? Generated by Caroline: She suggested that the internet is a coke bottle. The internet is our coke bottle in that we are being introduced to an economy that is not all about managing scarcity. There are bits and bytes all over the place. What are we going to do with this coke bottle. Ooh I am getting excited now. Thanks for thi

110 everyday experiments

Call yourself Empty a word of its meaning Look in vain for \I" Make the world last twenty minutes See the stars below you See a landscape as a stretched canvas Lose something and not know what Recall where you were this morning Hurt yourself briefly Feel eternal Telephone at random Rediscover your room after a journey Drink while urinating Make a wall between your hands Walk in the dark Dream of all the places in the world Peel an apple in your head Imagine yourself high up Imagine your imminent death Try to measure existence Count to a thousand Dread the arrival of the bus Run in a graveyard Play the fool Watch a woman at her window Invent lives for yourself Look at people from a moving car Follow the movement of ants Eat a nameless substance Watch dust in the sun Resist tiredness Overeat Play the animal Contemplate a dead bird Come across a childhood toy Wait while doing nothing Try not to think Go to the hairdresser Shower with your eyes closed Sleep on your front in the sun G

Lifehack advice - be fluid, abhor stasis

Be like water. Powerful. Gentle. Adaptable. Ever-changing. Being static in a dynamic world – like the one you and I inhabit – is a recipe for disaster. If you can’t adapt, you can’t succeed. Our practical, three dimensional reality, and everything in it, is in a constant state of transition, while some of us are in a constant state of “same”. Statues don’t succeed, they just get crapped on. Watch out for the pigeons. Source: Lifehack

How-to argue

set a goal that is not 'get the other to admit they are wrong' LOVE - Listen, Observe body language, Verify their point, Empathise even if you don't agree find common ground take a break before you argue agree on small points, defer the bigger points compliment the other acknowledge that the other is allowed to feel what they feel don't raise your voice "What is it about you are feeling that I don't understand" if you are wrong you can't afford to lose your temper, if you are right, you can discuss, don't argue agree to disagree, we don't have to agree just because you are quiet doesn't mean you are peaceful in an emotional argument, hug the person and reassure "I don't want to fight. (NOT BUT) I need to tell you something that's concerning me" it's better to be happy than right don't keep score of past arguments

The Internet, trends in content containment and relevance

April 2009: Media Conference MIT6 (transcription) Jessica Clark Time based media - durable stable Space based - ephemeral How can old media participate? Allow publics to form without corporate interference Paradigm shifts Broadcast to network Consumption to conversation Situated to ubiquitous Library to Cloud Citizen is the platform Choice, 24/7, curating media, creating media, collaboration with each other and traditional media Hyperprojects for profit and not for profit Each project has multiple outlets - network of producers Futureofpublicmedia.net Ellen Hume Old media is dying, the old media didn’t ask for action, new media gives phone number, website, facebook group Writing was done for a few officials, and journos crossed their fingers that those officials would be embarrassed enough to do something Publics decide to take up issues, SeeClickFix , the public finds out here and takes it up as an issue. Citizen engagement tool for establishing priorities for

Michael Jackson and Barbie and misplaced public outrage

Excerpt from: Human Nature, learning from the Michael Jackson cacophony The article wasn't really about this, but this struck me: "I may be off in my interpretation of his physical transformation as racial subversion, but trust me when I tell you that, if this were merely aspiration to whiteness, something I might add that many Americans work hard at - regardless of their racial background - so why are we angry at MJ's attempts, most of us wouldn't have a problem with his embodied performance. Otherwise, where is the outrage when a Beyoncé or Lil' Kim shows up on stage looking like a Barbie Doll? Where's the outrage when any public woman - regardless of race - shows up with fake breasts and hair? Some interesting gender and racial issues are on display here in terms of whose bodies should change and whose shouldn't." Source: Diary of an anxious black woman via Toni Kruger

Scientology basics for total ignoramuses

I am teaching Scientologists at the moment and they want to learn in a specific way and have asked me to learn how to teach them. Why not? So, here are the notes I am making while learning how to teach a Scientologist. Basics of Scientology • Religious philosophy • practical methods to better • knowing about knowing Basics of Study Technology • study technology used to learn • willingness to know • focus on how can I apply this • student must be an empty cup , not feel they know everything First barrier of study: Absence of mass • must have the thing you are studying in front of you • it must be real and tangible, practical • pictures and words are not enough • demonstration kit full of objects • clay demonstration - a kind of visualisation Second barrier of study: Too steep a gradient • babysteps • go back to find where the track was lost Third barrier of study: The misunderstood word • not understood or wrongly understood word • unable to take in the info di

Facebook truths, real world voices more impactful

One of these days we will sit down with a wyntjie, don't you worry. I have hooked up with friends that I haven't seen in 20 years and had a wyntjie and been amazed that my heart still responds to the cadences of their voices. Isn't that amazing! Like, AMAZING! Just the same way memories come back from scents in the air, so our hearts always respond to the voices of people we care about. That's a gift.

Don't Ask, Don't Tell policy commentary by Dan Savage on Barak Obama's position

Keith Olbermann interviews Dan Savage and says: Obama is "Goddamned Wrong" on Don't Ask, Don't Tell Policy Fetsiboomsticks: Can I say it AGAIN. Dan Savage's verbal acuity blows my braincells apart. "Obama is the president, he doesn't have to blink out distress signals, he can issue orders" and "How many more retrograde bigots do we have to wait to get up to speed for" and "(Obama) needs to stop pandering to religious conservatives, not all religious people oppose rights for gays and lesbians" and "There's tremendous symbolic value to (the president raising the issue of abolishing Don't Ask, Don't Tell"). :) Still blown away. Source: YouTub e via Facebook

Trust is a test, says Dan Savage

Sjoe, there are so many things going right! Right this second the thing that is impressing me is learning that "A relationship is built on trust" is a phrase that is vilely, disgustingly, putridifyingly, irritatingly, suckily, annoyingly passive. Spit! Dan Savage, as always brilliant because he agrees with me incessantly, points out that in order to build trust with someone who is jealous, you give them the power. They control you and you submit to their control with the trust that they are working towards letting you have that other relationship that you need to fulfill whatever need it is you are looking to be filled. They learn to trust you with babysteps, and you learn if they will abuse their power to deprive you of what you need. This is the truncated version. See Dan for details. :)

Fantastically simple solutions to problems

How to prevent corruption by officials ? Solution: Uniforms with no pockets (702) How to prevent the wearing of Burkas? Make it compulsory for prostitutes to wear them (Rory Sutherland) How to popularise an ugly vegetable and make it infinitely eatable? Make it a vegetable not for plebs but only for kings, guard the fields where it is grown and don't guard them awfully well. If something is worth growing it's worth stealing. (Rory Sutherland) How to make people keep the road rules? Points loss. Start with twelve and have them taken away. "Oh dear, I only have three left." (Rory Sutherland) How to stop people from multitasking on mobile devices? Call on them. Ask them for their opinion. Ask them to extrapolate a solution based on what you were saying, ask them for an opinion or some facts and figures. (article, sorry no reference) How to manage the information that large groups hold? Take the problem to the people - internet, tagging (Clay Shirky)

Seven success notes

• just do it, don't think. • self-belief carries your talent into the world • make mistakes and learn from it because mistakes are not failure, situations have things to teach • work, sacrifice, learn, study, discipline • deliver, no matter what • actively ask for real feedback, allow yourself to be analysed, turn the self-knowledge into a self-motivation • be persistent but not stubborn • feel fear but don't let it stop you Source: 702

Public speaking - Tips on how to deliver a presentation professionally

How to deliver a presentation professionally (Tanya's version of) Start with a bang - summarise and explain your thesis in short punchy sentences, before going into more detail. Find out the audience's needs - plan according to THEIR needs. Don't oversell - give them just what they need. Don't present by rote - be loose, prompt cards, visuals that guide you, never read the visual content. When info gets dense - use humor. Rehearse - out loud and stand. Never exceed your time - rather be too short than too long. Be in control - your nerves, the audience, the room layout, the technical aspects of the talk, time, etc. Plan the end - it must be strong and confident, the audience must be left with an action plan. Be professional - look, act, behave, speak, and perform like a pro. map why people are going to resist the idea, "you might not want to believe this because you believe" marvel for the audience, compelling, modelling what you want them to feel